It’s back to school for us this morning and I can’t deny being more than a little relieved.
Don’t get me wrong, I adore my babies, you know I do. But as I sit typing this now it’s pretty much the first time I’ve been on my own in about three weeks and it feels so nice to to have to talk to anyone. To not need to make someone a drink or a snack. To be sat at my desk, tapping away and making headway on my burgeoning “to do” list – or at least prepare to make a start on it! Working from home when the kids are on school holidays is never a great combination!
In fairness the kids have been great this last couple of weeks – yes there was bickering and I called “Quiet Play” at least once and sent them to their rooms to calm down for a bit but on the whole they’ve been ace. We had an awesome adventure in the Lakes (which I can’t wait to write about) and they made me so proud. But it was intense. And exhausting. We were already to press restart and get back to school this morning.
Amy in particular has been off nursery for three weeks and whilst I absolutely relish the time we get to spend together on our own, she really did need to be back with her friends this morning and into her normal routine. She’s always been something of a Mummy’s girl and this has been particularly evident over the course of Easter weekend where she has basically followed me round like a little shadow, even clinging to my leg at times when I’ve been trying to get jobs done. She’s clambered all over me, had tantrums if I wasn’t going upstairs at the exact same time as her, cried when Daddy brushed her hair instead of me. She has been mentally and physically exhausting at a time when I had not one single drop of patience left. I don’t think I’ve ever looked forward to dropping her off at Nursery as much as I did today.
And of course for that I feel guilty. I feel guilty for snapping at her and for needing a break. She won’t always want to cling to me will she? She won’t always need to be everywhere I am or to clamber all over me to be as close as she possibly can.
So, in another hour I will pick my little girl up from Nursery, recharged from a couple of hours peace, give her the biggest hug and enjoy wandering home in the sunshine, chatting about what she’s been up to while she was away. (I can guarantee it will have involved dolls).