I don’t know how or when it happened. When did Ben and Chloe become too big to pick up? Was there a day I decided I couldn’t lift them any more?
Amy still likes me to pick her up, to carry her. She’s 4. She’s tall. It’s not easy. I can’t carry her far and nor do I really want to and I often find myself refusing her. But I cherish those moments where I pick her up and she wraps her limbs around me for the tightest of cuddles.
Before long she will be too big too. Will I know it’s the last time or will I realise all too late that it has stopped and I can no longer pick her up?
The big two are putting themselves to bed several nights a week now, they are increasingly independent and whilst I love this to a point as it just makes life easier for Dave & I, it is another step along the road to them growing up, another step further away from them being little.
My babies are growing so fast. Faster than I’m ready for. I want to pick them up and hold them tight forever. I’m not ready for them to be too big to pick up, to sit on my knee or to hold my hand. I’m not ready for it to be the last time.